Diary of a Depressed Mom

Day One:

This morning I woke up feeling exhausted – even though Easton slept all night, I still feel like I got no sleep. I think sometimes that is the hardest part of being a mom – feeling so tired and knowing you are not going to be able to sleep all day – or perhaps that is the hardest part of being depressed.

Corey took the truck today, which happened to have Easton’s car seat in it – I really hate when he does this, I feel trapped – I can’t leave the house or go for a sanity drive. I don’t really know why he does this so frequently. It’s almost as though he doesn’t care that I’ll be stuck at home all day, he doesn’t care that sitting at home every single day is driving me nuts, he just doesn’t care.

Most of today I spent in my fog – when my depression becomes so bad I feel as though I am in another world looking down on myself, I call this my fog. I did my regular day-to-day chores and activities with the kids, had a short conversation with the neighbor and counted down the minutes left until bedtime.

I don’t know why bedtime is what I look forward to the most – perhaps it’s so my kids don’t have to see me sad anymore, or because I get hopeful that tomorrow will be a better day – or maybe it’s because I know I can finally have my mental breakdown and no one will have to know about it.

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How to Master Instagram Engagement

Instagram is one of my favorite social media networks, and it is the social media network I focus on to grow my blog. So, after starting my Instagram account, my question became, “how do I grow my following?”  And I thought, there has to be some secret that I’m missing.  I was so tired of seeing blog posts about being successful on Instagram that gave the same points about writing a killer bio, sticking to a strict theme, and that f*cking follow-unfollow method.  If you haven’t read my post already “How to Gain Instagram Followers” you should definitely go check that out first.

One of the main points I made in that post is in order to receive engagement you have to give engagement. If you haven’t noticed, engagement is everything on Instagram.  With the new algorithm, posts are ranked according to the comments that they receive. Comments are now way more valuable than likes.  And Instagram is super smart. Comments are only factored into your post’s ranking if they are longer than three words. So if someone leaves an emoji or “Awesome (y)”, it is like they didn’t leave a comment at all!

But why is post ranking important?  Posts aren’t appearing in chronological order anymore, the feed only displays the content that it feels you are interested in. The new algorithm affects the ability of both your followers and non followers to find your posts. And that is why I have created this guide to help you rock Instagram engagement.

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Boost Your Immune System

Fall is fast approaching and with that comes the dreaded cold and flu season. Did you know that the common cold is the leading cause of missed time at work or school? That’s right! It is estimated that up to 20% of Canadians will experience cold and flu like symptoms this year!

There are ways to avoid falling victim this year, and it starts with boosting your immune system!

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5 Tips to Surviving a Week Without Daddy

Tomorrow marks five – FIVE whole days since Corey has left to go on a work trip. I would love to sit here and tell you this week has flown by and we had so much fun. But to be honest, that’s just not the truth.

Truth is, we have had meltdowns – from both the kids but also from me. We have had cuts and scrapes, and sleepless nights. We have had only soup for dinner and skipped bath night …. two nights in a row.

Its been hard. To be honest I don’t think that in the five years Corey and I have been together we have ever gone this long apart. I knew that the kids would have a hard time but I never imagined that I would be having a hard time as well.  I miss my best friend, I miss whispering about our days as the kids are both asleep, I miss our silly jokes and I miss feeling so secure and safe knowing he’s next to me at night. I miss my time alone and hot showers. I miss seeing him snuggled up with our babies at night – but most importantly I miss my sanity.

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Yelling Does Not Help

I never wanted to be the mom who judged other moms. I know life is hard – I know sometimes these tiny humans we gave birth to know how to push every single one of our buttons. But you are solely responsible for raising them to be respectful, genuine, thoughtful adults – do you really think yelling in their face and humiliating them is going help in that?

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Labour and Delivery Story

“Whenever and however you intend to give birth, your experience will impact your emotions, your mind, your body and your spirit for the rest of your life.” – Ina May Gaskin

Easton Arend Wassing 

Born August 20th 2016 

8 pounds 9 ounces 

20 inches long 

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I am Not a Perfect Mom

Every night I go to bed and tell myself that tomorrow will be a better day, tomorrow I will be a better mom, I will yell less, and play more. Tomorrow we will eat healthy and go to bed on time.

But then tomorrow comes, and its the same as the day before: two tantrums before 9AM, cereal all over the floor, and I have threatened to throw away all of the toys.

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How to Meal Plan

Going along with my previous post about budgeting – staying on budget with groceries is something I work towards every week and something I previously struggled with.

I used to go to the grocery store – once, twice, maybe even three times a week – with no list and no real idea what I was going to making for meals.

I started noticing that we were spending $600 or more a month on groceries for a family of three, and by the end of the week I would have to throw away so much spoiled food! It was a waste of money, but more importantly, it was a waste of food.

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How to Save on Your Hydro/ Water Bill

When you buy your own house, you quickly realize that the bills add up – and it can become very overwhelming very quickly. I remember getting my hydro and water bills and not thinking twice about how much they were. I would just pay the $160 (sometimes more) and move on to the next bill.

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How to Budget: Single Income Family

Before moving in together, my husband and I had both never lived on our own – so the concept of a budget was never something we had thought about. It was barely two months after buying our home when I realized that we were not spending our money wisely, and if we kept up the way we were going, we would soon have no money!

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